February 11, 2013 by Rex
Last night was another rough night. I think it was a little tougher than the night before. But for psychological reasons than it actually BEING any different.
It was MUCH harder to find that Zen place or to have that attitude from the night before, last night. I think some of that was, “Oh, NO! Not again tonight.”
I actually decided to get up this time and come out to the family room, lay down on the couch with Tiger blanket and Clark, for warmth and then have Spongebob running in the background. A recipe that has worked many times for me when I was having trouble sleeping in the past.
But I also had the help of the Trazodone then too. Which I did not have last night. So it kinda helped. I think what really helped with it was kind of break up the sameness. After the DVD ran through a couple times, I decided it wasn't the cure and went back into the bedroom.
The comedy, and the more comfortable bed, and the fact I broke up the night with the Spongebob DVD, seemed to help me rest a little better in the bed this time round.
I feel like I do have bouts where I fall asleep. But it's REALLY hard to tell. It seems like there will be some comedy routines I might hear the beginning of and then I'll hear the end, but I won't really remember hearing the whole bit.
The biggest point to realize though is: I made it through the second night! And really it's not that it was any easier, or even that night three is taking me on the downhill side of sleepless nights.
No. It's that I made it one day closer to my goal of getting through this thing and getting OFF the Trazodone forever!!!
I think it helps this morning the fact I got on the scale and was back down to 197. My weight had started to creep back up last week and was back over 200 and it was bumming me out a little.
But it felt good to be down. And looking in the mirror I could almost, maybe, sort of, kinda see an area, maybe, not sure, think I did, it's possible, oh yeah, well, it could be, ya think? A difference in the way I looked. 🙂
And that's really more important to me than the number on the scale.
I was kinda sore, well, somewhat all over, but mainly in the lower back, yesterday. It is most likely caused by the lack of restful sleep. This morning, I too, have woken up sore and stiff in that area. People remark to having flu-like symptoms, during the detoxing of Trazodone.
If you take any advice away from all this, let it be this: Don't get placed on drugs! I understand, believe me I understand, there are times in our lives where we just need something extra, SOMETHING, to help us have a restful night's sleep.
So if you must get on these things in order to be able to get through a difficult time in your life, and still be able to function in our society during the day, then by all means.
But once that time has passed, GET OFF THE DRUGS!!! Explore meditation. Yoga is a great one for me. There are different beginner yoga instructions on YouTube that can help.
Seek a counselor to talk through matters and take the time to get away from the stresses sometime, everyday , of your life.
It's SO easy to pop pills in order to “solve” your problem on a daily basis. So easy to not have, or make the time for yourself. And I mean, look at how much more you can accomplish in a day by just popping this or that pill. I don't need to take the hour or more and dedicate it to myself. “Look, I can just take this pill, fix the issue, and now I've created an extra hour in my day that I can get more stuff done.”
People look at their neighbors, co-workers, or more likely, celebrities and people they don't know, but admire, and see all the things they have accomplished and want to be more like them, but don't have the energy.
DON'T COMPARE YOURSELF!!! And if you want to accomplish more… I can't stress enough on what an hour of exercising can do for you throughout the day.
Now, Mass HGH. 2 days also. I can't say that it helps with sleep, since I'm really not sleeping. But I was hoping it would fight against the Trazodone withdrawal, and who knows, maybe it is and things would be worse without it. (I don't plan on finding out.)
I thought in the reviews I had read, they said that it took a few days for you to begin to see the effects. But, now, in looking through the reviews again to find that info, I, of course, can't.
So can I tell if it's working? I don't know. In reviewing the reviews again, reviewers (getting sick of the word review yet 🙂 ) said they noticed waking up ready to get up and felt energized throughout the day. That could help explain why I felt okay yesterday. And don't feel exhausted and terrible this morning.
And I did say that I kinda, almost, thought I saw, maybe a possible little difference in the upper body, stomach area this morning in the mirror.
Also, I've been taking it two days that I have not had heavy workouts and lifts. That will change a little bit today with Monday's routine and I may supplement a little with my own lifts. Tomorrow is also another hard hitting day and Wednesday, although a day off in the “Neanderthal workout”, I will do a pretty heavy upper body workout.
So I'll I hope to really notice a difference by the end of this week.